Stay Away

January 30, 2016

We are not that close as before. We don't talk as much as before. You've changed. And I did too. But we still do care for each other. Yes, there were changes. With the way we talk, the time we've spent time to each other, the stories we shared to one another. It's not the same anymore. We never talked about those changes. Then, there were awkward moments between us. But eventually, we live up to them. We allowed ourselves to just be okay with those changes. Less talk, less arguments and less awkwardness. I can't actually describe the relationship we have right now. We are not super close but I felt that we wanted to bring back the closeness we had before but we can't say it to each other. Every time you talk to me, I feel that you wanted to really have a real talk. And not merely just saying hi or hello. But then again, we can't do it anymore. We cannot express our feeling to one another. And I think that it's fine. I'm okay with it. I'm not really comfortable having a long talk with you anymore. I don't know if I already lost the trust that I had once with you. But sometimes, I want to give it a shot again. Tonight, you made me a little confused. After dinner, we bumped to each other. Just for the thought of saying anything, I teased you that you ate a lot and will be fat. And of course, you do the explaining and denying that it wasn't true. I just laughed at you. Then there you are. As I walking away, you suddenly trying to hug me from the back. I was hesitant. I resist. But eventually, you were able to give me a slight back hug while saying that you miss me. Staying away will be the best thing I can do for you. I'm sorry, but I should stop right here.